It’s not goodbye forever!

It’s not goodbye forever!

Leaving a long term position by Fi Star-Stone

 

 

It’s been almost eight years since I started my job with the wonderful Hoffmann family, and here we all are, at the end of an era, saying goodbye.

 

There’s a lump in my throat as I write this, and yet a smile in my heart for all of the wonderful memories I have of such a loving and fun family.

 

I have given my best and in return they have given me love, and showed their appreciation in so many ways. I have been treated both as a professional and a member of the family. How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.

 

So why am I leaving such a wonderful family?

 

Handing in my notice was one of the hardest, and most emotional, things I’ve ever had to do. It was such a hard decision, and one I didn’t make lightly.

 

My husband and I are from Stafford, and all of our friends and family are there. We felt it was time to move back home and with this comes the exciting prospect of opening my own Nursery.

 

I think I gave the longest notice period in nanny history! Nine months in fact!

 

I wanted to give them so much time, as they needed to think about what they were going to do. To the boy’s great delight, their father, James, has decided to take over from my nannying duties and become a full time dad!

 

It’s a hard job being a Nanny, but a rewarding one, and I thoroughly enjoy it. It’s been fabulous watching the boys grow over the years, catching them when they fall, encouraging their steps and using my super nanny powers of persuasion when dealing with the dreaded green vegetables! All of these things and many more have helped them grow into wonderful, polite, well balanced boys that I love dearly.

 

Some people appear surprised when I say how much I love the boys, but for me it’s part of the process in being a nanny. Mary Poppins would disagree:

 

And what would happen to me, may I ask, if I loved all the children I say goodbye to?’ Poppins, 1964  

 

It’s simply not possible to keep such a distance in this wonderful job. We go into the homes of families, and many of us stay for years. We would have to be superhuman to not form bonds! I love the relationship I have with the boys, Karen, their mother, tells me I’m their best friend which is the loveliest thing to hear.

 

So here I am in the final few weeks with my little friends. I can’t imagine my days without them, but I’m so happy that they say they have had as wonderful a time as I have.

 

It’s not goodbye forever, I’ve promised them faithfully that I shall be visiting them lots, and taking them out for tea, and they have proudly declared, ‘we are coming to your new house and having our own room!’

 

On Halloween, my last day and one of our favourite holidays, Karen and James are throwing me a spooky leaving party. This wonderful gesture means my hardest day with the boys will be cheered up and made easier with fun and games and a firework show!  All of the nannies I’ve worked with are coming along with their charges and some parents I’ve formed friendships with over the years are doing the same. The boys are insisting that this year I shouldn’t ‘be a witch again, because it’s not scary anymore, please be something even scarier!’ So my thinking cap is on; maybe something that can hide the tears that will, no doubt, come flooding as I say my goodbyes!

So it’s the end of an era, the end of me being their Nanny, but the beginning of a new chapter for all of us; a new chapter that will be populated with new memories for us to share with each other as the years go by and the boys grow into young men that tower over me.

 

I would like to take this opportunity to say a great big thank you to Karen and James for their respect, kindness and generosity over the years. I would also like to thank Jack and Ben the two wonderful little boys I have cared for. They are both my dear little friends and it has been a pleasure to look after them for the past eight years.

 

So, even though Mary Poppins is wrong, I have my own umbrella at the ready; out it pops, and off I fly to pastures new...

 

 

 

Back to School Blues?

The return to school can trigger mixed emotions in both parents and children and can be an unsettling time in the house. It's impotant to work togtether to dissolve any apprenhantions and start the school year happy and positive, but this can be difficult. 

Parents may feel sadness that extended time together as a family is over, mixed with relief that they don’t have to provide all-day care while their children are at school. Children may feel excited at a new term and being back with friends, or apprehensive at what awaits them. 

Those who are approaching a change – going from nursery to primary, primary to secondary or starting a significant year with important exams – may feel particularly uncomfortable, as may their parents, so it is particularly important to be positive about starting school, and make it an exciting, not daunting time.

Parents who did not have a positive experience of school may, without realising it, pass on their anxiety to their children or find it difficult to support their children by communicating with their teachers. It is difficult not to pass on your own fears to your children, but essential to maintain a healthy and positive apporach to school life. Times have changed, schools are a lot more equipped than in our day, and teachers are more caring and responsive to childrens needs. Children benefit from encouragement and reassurance from their parents about going back to school, and from having anxieties listened to and taken seriously.

School is where your children will form many of their firm friendships, and this can be the case for you too! It's great chatting to other parents about any anxieites you might have, or anything you are unsure off. Dont worry, everyone is in the same boat!

Buying uniforms can be a headache task, but make it fun, not a chore. Don't be pressurised to buy labels, or the most expensive items, it's not a fashion parade in the early days, however when your school starters turn into teens they may argue otherwise!

Many supermarkets now offer uniforms at a competitive price, so its worth shopping around. Make sure you have plenty of everything, you dont want to end up washing and ironing more often than you need to!

 Asda     Tesco    Matalan

 

Most importantly, enjoy your childs return to school. If it's their first day- don't forget the camera!

Enjoy!

Easter Chocoholics!

Easter is a fun time of year, and another excuse for spoling the little ones rotten, yet in this days society when the focus is on healthy eating - is it wrong to give our children so much chocolate?

Should children be limited in the amount of chocolate they eat? Most people would say yes; Children need limits, but they also need to learn things for themselves surely?

What would really happen if you didn't limit the amount of chocolate your child ate at Easter? Well, most likely, they would eat a lot of chocolate. Quite a lot of chocolate, in fact. Then they would develope an uncomfortable tummy ache and thus learning a valuable lesson- or would they? While the idea of 'learning for themselves' this Easter might seem like a good idea, we have a responsability to teach our children well, and care for them, let them have life experiences, but with guidance and control and care.

Some would argue that this is a valuable lesson to learn- eating so much that it makes them sick, but is it really a valuable lesson? Would the child learn that when they eat too much chocolate, they get a stomach ache; therefore they shouldn't eat as much chocolate, or would they think all chocolate makes them sick?

We all love things that are bad for us, I love chocolate, but too much just isn't great for us, so bare this in mind on Easter Sunday, when you are surrounded by a thousand calories, remember sugar rushed children and a tummy full of chocolate dont mix very well!


Top Five Christmas cards for school bags!


There's no doubt about it, Christmas is an expensive time of year.
Let's not get all bah-humbug about it though, as Sir Cliff would say (or rather, sing,) it's a time for giving.....

So, without a moments more scrooging, here are our top five suggestions your little darlings to give to their friends this Christmas.

1.Woolworths 'make your own' card kit

price £5.99


Create your own festive hand-made cards with this pack of 50 Cream A6 Cards and Envelopes from Craft Tonic. Boasting outstanding value, the pre-creased card measures 10.5cm by 14.9cm and co-ordinates brilliantly with the matching envelopes.

Either draw or paint a picture, or get super creative and add stickers and ribbons.






2.WHSmiths 30 Glittered Christmas Cards

Price £4.99

WHS 30 Glittered Christmas CardsProduct Description
Three designs, two small square and one tall rectangular design. Featuring Santa, a fairy or Rudolph, all with glittery background and curvy lettering Greeting inside reads 'Christmas Magic', 'Cosy Christmas', or 'Season's Snuggles'.


3.WHSmiths 12 Doctor Who Charity Christmas CardsWHS 12 Doctor Who Charity Christmas Cards


Design features Doctor Who, with TARDIS and Santa in the background and 'Merry Christmas'
Greeting inside reads '...have an Amazing time!'
All proceeds from this pack will benefit the BBC Children in Need Appeal

4.
25 Pudsey Mini Christmas Cards
25 Pudsey Mini Cards
Price £2.50
All proceeds from this pack will benefit the BBC Children in Need Appeal

5. 25 Childrens Fairy cards
Boots 25 Fairy Kids Cube Card
Price £2.50

small and fun for little school bags!

There are so many cards out there to choose from, We hope we have helped with our suggested top five!
now all you have to do is buy them, then get your children to write them! Easy?

 Good luck!




Terrible Tantrums!

  Its 3 o'clock in a busy supermarket and little Beth has decided it's time for some tantrums! You're standing by the cheese counter wishing the ground would swallow you up while the little old lady to your right tuts and stares.........

What is a temper tantrum?

A temper tantrum is an   immature way to express anger   or frustration and usually peaks between the ages of 12-36 months.

No matter how   wonderful a parent or carer   you are, your child will probably have a temper tantrum at some point   in their early years.  

 

 

 

 

What should I do if my child has a temper tantrum?

 

There are two different types of tantrums and these are:

                                                     Frustration/Fatigue

Attention seeking/Demanding

 

Frustration & Fatigue

Tantrums tend to occur most frequently during periods of tiredness, and hunger. It is important to support and help children having frustration or fatigue related tantrums. The child needs encouragement and understanding most at this time.

Attention seeking/Demanding

 It is important to ignore attention seeking or demanding type tantrums. This kind of tantrum includes whining, crying, pounding or hitting the floor, and breath holding, if possible and safe, leave the room or put your child into a safe environment to have his 'time out'   so your child will not have an audience.

Do not give into your child’s demands, this will only encourage future tantrums.

Physically move children having refusal type or avoidance type tantrums.

If the refusal is unimportant, like drinking all of his milk or eating all, let it go.

If the refusal is important, like attending   nursery, getting dressed or   sitting down for mealtimes, the child should not be able to avoid the issue by having a tantrum.

Try giving your child a five minute warning of activity change   prior to stopping   the activity, if a tantrum occurs, let it for a few minutes, acknowledge the child’s feelings, but state what needs to be done, such as 'I know you were really enjoying the play dough, but its time to tidy up for tea now.'

Use time-outs for disruptive type tantrums.

Disruptive tantrums include: clinging to you as they have a tantrum, hitting you, scream or yelling, having temper tantrum in a public place, and throwing or damaging property during the tantrum.

Give the child a time out, the age of the child in minutes is appropriate.

Hold children having harmful or rage type tantrums in an unsafe environment.

When the child is completely out of control, hold him if possible, they are probably frightened by their behavior, and offer them your sense of control.

Hold them for about 1-3 minutes until you feel their body relax.

If the child doesn’t want to be comforted, that is O.K. as well.

 

 

 

 

When you should get help

If your child hurts himself during a tantrum

If the above tips haven’t worked in a two week period (and you have followed them without giving in to demands.)

Any other parental questions or concerns regarding the intensity of the tantrums not covered here.

After the tantrum

Talk through with your child about the problem that caused the tantrum such as 'we had to put the play dough away because its tea time'

                    Remember, praise your child when he/she is able to control their temper and verbalize their anger.

                    Be a good role model for your child by staying calm and not having adult tantrums.

 

 

 

                                     

Looking for a nanny? Looking for a job?

So you're looking for a Nanny?
Or your a Nanny looking for a position?
Why use an Agency?

There are many advantages to using an Agency for both parents and Nannies if the Agency is of a high standard and reputable. There are unfortunatley, many agencies that do not take into account, the needs of both parents and nanies, and often send mismatched nannies for interview.

My employers used many different avenues when looking for a nanny. They used an agency, Simply childcare, Lady Magazine and Nursery World.
It is through the magazines rather than the agency that I saw the positon advertised, and after interview, reference and qualification checks, I succesfully gained my position and have been here happily for almost seven years!


I have used agencies in the past and found them very helpful, especially when moving to a new area, my first Nannying position in 1993 was in Richmond, and I was moving from Staffordshire!

Sometimes though agencies dont do their jobs properly, my employers told me that when using an agency, they were often sent unsuitable canditates, clearly what they had told the agency they were not looking for. One applicant wanted a live in position, and the job was clearly live out. I have heard about these mishaps on many occasions when talking with nanny friends.

“Agencies can often send you on a string of interviews, none of which were suitable or what you ask for” said one Nanny friend,

“ I have often been sent on interviews with families who are not prepared to pay me what the agnecy had agreed for my qualifiaction and experience, the whole money thing gets really embarassing” said another.

Some Agencies claim the Aupairs on their books are Nannies, and this can lead to many disapointing interviews for both parties. Many parents seeking childcare are not aware of the huge difference between a nanny and an Aupair, and many agencies confuse this matter, by adverising as a Nanny agency, when they are clearly an Aupair agency.

There are many agencies that do protect both parties, and match many families to their perfect nannies. They can take care of contracts, employment guidelines,and holiday and pay issues. Some of these things are hard to arrange without awkwardness, and agencies can take away that downside to hiring a nanny.however, there are many money making agencies, that dont have either paries interests thought of.

A shocking experiment carried out by Qualified NNEB Nanny Helen Taggart for Bestbear.co.uk showed many agencies were prepared to send her for interview without checking references or her experience. “ Some agencies glossed over my details and seemed more interested in finding out which other agencies in their area I had called. They would proceed to tell me why the others were no good and that I should go with their agency - no mention of lack of experience etc. They were far more interested in grabbing business. One agency owner I spoke to astounded me. I said, 'I don't have any childcare qualifications like the NNEB or anything.' She interrupted by saying 'What is the NNEB - what does that mean? I've never heard of it.' It made me want to weep.” ( Helen Taggart bestbear.co.uk).

It seems that Nanny Agencies can be set up pretty easily and quickly and those who choose to do so to make a quick buck and not offer a proffesional service, make it really unfair on those fantastic Agencies, that do take the time and care in providing proffessional nannies to proffessional people, like TLC Nannies, an angency co owned by Louise Kirk, a previous winner of The Proffessional Nanny of the year Awards. TLC, take time to come out to the clients home and really listen to what the needs are of the family. Many agencies dont take the time to do this, simply sending every nanny they have on their books, to every position they have available!

In conclusion I would say there are many benefits to using an agency, but parents and nannies looking to use an agency should check that they are experienced in dealing with families and Proffessional Nannies.

Agencies who are a member of AGA (The Association of Nanny Agencies) are agencies that have been accredited by the organisation and complies with the AGA guidelines that aims to, 'Establish a Professional Code of Conduct for all nanny agencies, ensuring they meet with their legal obligations and duty of care for both the nanny and the employer. Parents seeking a nanny through an agency will be assured that every possible check has been performed regarding the nanny's overall suitability, to ensure their children will be cared for in the most professional manner. The nanny will be fully trained and possess the skills appropriate for the child/children's age group, ability and/or special needs.' AGA, ( www.anauk.org ) .

Happy hunting!

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